Contemplating Life’s Choices

Note: This post is part of a series about burnout recovery and why, despite the efforts to follow the research on how to recover from burnout, we can still burnout again. This series was initially delivered as part of a presentation I did here in Utah and aligns with my coaching and speaking work.

I recently had the opportunity to present to two cohorts of the Women’s Leadership Institute Career Development Series about burnout. It was a special honor to me because I’m an alumni of the program and know the impact hearing from some of the top voices in Utah about everything from leadership, personal development, civic engagement, and more. Knowing I was once part of this audience I wanted to make sure I brought something different to my presentation.

If you’re fortunate to not have experienced burnout, or are struggling to know if you are experiencing it, the definition I learned when I first burned out in 2024 was burnout is characterized by feelings of energy depletion or exhaustion, increased mental distance from one’s job, feelings of negativism or cynicism related to one’s job, and reduced professional efficacy.

Over a years worth of research into burnout as I faced my own recovery I started to see that burnout was never just a personal failing but was a result of systems designed to create the conditions for burnout. I found Teddy McGlynn-Wright and Leslie Briner’s podcast episode that described how we embody trauma and healing across 5 layers: individual, collective, systemic, intergenerational, and historical. It started to come together for me that recovering from burnout was not just solving for issues that showed up at work, it was learning to cope with everything else that was shaping my worldview and lived experience.

When I first burned out I hit the wall where I couldn’t function and ended up taking six weeks off work to sort things out. I spent time practicing yoga, reading everything I could get my hands on about burnout, and trying to be present while letting my days be less structured.

At six weeks I’m not sure that I was truly ready to go back to work but I knew it needed to happen so I jumped back in. I applied all the research I’d done to ease back in to things. I set boundaries, I asked for and received help from colleagues, and I stopped saying yes to everything so I could have adequate space to focus on my work. I did everything right. I followed the recommendations from the books, podcasts, and research and in 2026 I burned out again.

For someone who is a recovering perfectionist, over-thinker, and people pleaser to feel like I was failing again was too much. For the first part of 2026 I went in and out of depression and anxiety. Some weeks felt like it just wasn’t worth trying if life was going to always feel like this. At times I couldn’t see a way forward that didn’t result in being back in the same place in another year. The worst part, was I had a super supportive leadership team around me, my team was amazing and I wanted to support them well, and the work I did was something I still believed in and loved. I kept feeling like I should have been able to reintegrate and feel like burnout was in the past for me.

As I prepared what I would say about burnout while reflecting on my experience I realized recovering from burnout was more than just setting boundaries, creating moments for self care, and being willing to receive help. I realized that, particularly for women, I was caught in The Resilience Trap.

If you are currently in burnout and feel you can’t go on you can call or text the Crisis Line at 988 24/7. If you are not in immediate crisis but want additional support you can call or look up your local 211 for free and confidential health and human services. If you are employed, I also recommend looking into your insurance or other benefits to see if you have free or discounted access to therapy, wellness, or self-care support.